marriage and motherhood.

With the announcement of engagements among friends in my graduating class, I realize that many of us are going to be parents by the time I get out of graduate school- one of my friends was married and pregnant at graduation.  Now, you can't be a parent without being an adult yourself, so this must mean we are entering real adulthood. On the other hand, I do believe that parents grow up with their kids, that parenthood is best learned with experience. My parents look like giddy kids when I look at my baby pictures now, but I remember thinking they were infinitely older and wiser.

The average age of first-time mothers has been steadily increasing for the past decades from 21.4 in 1970 to 25.0 in 2006. There is also a greater percentage of first-time mothers at an older age.

Source

A woman's fertility usually peaks at 22, and after 35 it is significantly harder for a woman to get pregnant. But think about the fact that a typical person graduates college at 22, spends four years in graduate school and another four to settle into a job and maybe a relationship- she may be 30 when she can even begin to consider having kids.

There has been much recent debate about part-time female doctors and their attempt at balancing family and career. But why is this a female issue? It takes two to have a kid, and behind every woman making a choice between family and career is a man who takes his job-option for granted.

Anyway, during my career crisis, I chatted with many professionals settled into their careers and curiously, all of the women asked if I were in a serious relationship, reminding me that this is an important aspect to consider when making life choices. But I wonder if they would have asked the same questions to males, if my male counterparts were reminded to consider marriage and family in constructing their life timelines.

I hope that I don't have to make such decisions in the future(I hope I never have to decide or choose), since a successful career is valuable for me and I would like to make full use of my education. But I think I am already ahead of the parenthood game, for example, I already know:
- how to negotiate bedtime
- how to find a pacifier under blankets and pillows in record time
- how to speak baby-talk